One thing that I have noticed in life, setting aside gender roles, is that not all women are endowed with an equal share of maternal instincts — and men, likewise, vary tremendously in the strength of their paternal instincts. I think very few individuals give that potential imbalance much thought before saying “I do.” My ex-wife tried very hard to be a good mother to my son, and for the most part she was … but we split baby-tending responsibilities right down the middle and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. And when we ultimately divorced I became the custodial parent — which, once again, was exactly what I wished for. So beyond how we are raised, and how ‘spoiled’ we may be, and regardless of our gender, I think more of us need to plumb — with brutal honesty — the strength of our respective parental instincts before baby makes three.