I think that you have expressed the pain and wariness of being "other" in America in a way that will help some white liberals move a little closer to "getting it." But let me offer a bit of hope if I may.
On or about 2043, white Americans will cease to be the majority race or ethnicity in this country. I grew up in rural, small town America, and I rarely saw people who didn't look, talk and dress the way that my family did. My home town had a population of 950, and the most visible "minority" were a handful of Catholic families. To me, as a child, that blindingly white community was America ... there were a few overt racists, but most folks wanted to be "good" people and thought that they were. They certainly weren't racist because, after all, they would be happy to chat with a black or brown person ... provided, of course, that said individual was a "regular" or "decent" law-abiding citizen who looked, talked and dressed the way that they did. We did have a migrant Mexican family that came in the spring one year and stayed for a couple of months ... that was about exotic as things ever got.
I left that town fifty years ago, but I have family there so I keep in touch. Small family farms have been replaced by large farms that have automated and need fewer workers. Fewer workers means fewer stores, fewer job opportunities and fewer schools. My home town now has a population of 350, and the few kids that remain will leave and pursue their lives elsewhere as soon as they graduate.
Yes, there are the Karens, the white nationalists, the mad-as-hell Trumpistas ... and a lot of confused and fearful white people who see the only America that they have ever known slowly become something else--and it scares them. For some, as they see their towns shrink and their children drive away, it is less about power and more about survival. Their America is dying.
I now live in the only state that has no dominant ethnic group--the only state where whites constitute a mere 25% of the population. I am not naive enough to say that Hawaii has no race issues--but I will say that it is so much better than the mainland. We have four primary ethnic groups and seven or eight small ones--so you are exposed to the "other" every time you turn around. And soon enough, you see that the "other" is you. Diversity is truly beautiful!
White America is seeing itself fade away and some are outraged, some are confused and other are just frightened. But demography is destiny ... it will happen. It won't be utopian and it sure as hell won't happen overnight, but Trump's attempt to turn back the clock and seat Euro-Americans at the front of the bus is a fool's errand.
