I don’t really celebrate Christmas, since I am Jewish. But if you insist on buying me a present, you may want to know that the only thing that I really need is more money for meth. It typically sells in 3.5 gram units for $120 each. So, $120 for the first unit, $240 for the second unit and $360 for the third. I am sure that you can do the math yourself.
Of course, any amount would help. But I suspect that you would feel the most satisfaction knowing that your gift has enabled me to procure at least one entire unit. I do know that Aunt Ruthie said that she was delighted to be able to send me an early present of $600 for five units. She apologized for not buying more, but as we all know, she is retired and is on a fixed income. Can I get a shout-out for Aunt Ruthie?
I know that some of you like to make your own presents for the holidays — it feels more personal that way. I am thinking of you Uncle Max … love those large wooden coatracks. Can never have too many coat racks here in the islands … and adding lettering that says “A Don Ho Original” was sheer brilliance.
Much love, and happy holidays!
Daniel
Aloha! I hope that you enjoyed this article and I welcome your feedback. If you would like to have daily access to more articles, on topics ranging from love to humor, from religion to politics…